CRADLED NEST

I cannot wait for Spring time to come!

That means that we will have bird songs waking us up in the mornings!

And it isn't just 'birds'...because birds are like people and you can't just say 'people' for your friends, because nobody will even know who you mean. You can't just say 'people'.

You have to say: Ryan and Tyler and Amanda and Beatrice. They are all different and they are all somebody else. They have their own names and they all have their favorite color. They live in a house that is not like somebody elses. They like different TV shows, and different songs and different stories and different FOOD. (But probably, they all like ice cream too!)

Well, that is just like for the birds. They have different nests. Some make their nests with string and bits of shiny stuff and paper and leaves and some make their nests in the tree trunks and some by the water and some in grass and some in bushes and some in houses that people make, and some birds live in branches or make twig houses, or on ledges, or on pebbles, or under crops, or under the eaves of people houses, or in forests, or inside chimneys or in mud. Plus, they all have different colors and sizes of eggs. So even if the momma bird isn't home and you can't see her...you can hurry and look real close at the eggs and then remember, remember, remember, while you run into the house to look in a book or on the computer and find out what the baby eggs will break out of their shells to be! Because Bluebird moms will always have Bluebird babies. And Meadowlark moms will always have baby Meadowlark birds. That is very terrific to me and that is why I like to climb trees sometimes. But I am careful not to touch the eggs or the mommy bird will fly back and think that I am in charge and won't take care of her babies anymore.

And that is why I don't want to just say 'Birds'...They all have different names and so I want to say Bluebirds or Cardinals or Gray Catbirds and Brown Headed Cowbirds and Whooping Cranes and Crows and Mourning Doves and Rock Doves and Mallard Ducks and Bald Eagles and Golden Eagles and Great Egrets and Peregrine Falcons and House Finches and Northern Flickers and Goldfinches and Canadian Geese and Red-Tailed Hawks and Great Blue Herons and Blue Jays and Kestrels and Killdeers and Loons and Meadowlarks and Mockingbirds and Robins and Owls and Osprey and Starlings and Whip-poor-wills and Turkeys and Wrens and Marbled Murrelets and Horned Puffins and Pigeons.

PLUS, they all sing different notes for their songs. But they all sing! My daddy said that if only the best Singing Birds sang, then the forests would be silent. He told me that every bird has a special sound and that all of them together make a beautiful song. "Hadley, what if the birds didn't sing because they thought some other kind of bird sang better?" OH MY! That would be sad to have Spring and no sounds AT ALL! Then he told me that sometimes people get silly like that and think that they shouldn't do things because someone else might do it better. That is silly, silly to the max!...Plus, it is important and I need to think about that. I just have to remember that I can try all kinds of things, even if I am not the best at it. ALL of us are important to make the whole song or whatever we are making or doing. I JUST have to DO MY PART. ..and that is good enough.

I read something else that is pretty much incredible and super duper quad-looper IMPORTANT! The baby bird has to peck its own way out of its egg OR IT WILL DIE! I am so not kidding about this. It has to crack its own egg by its own self so that it will get stronger and stronger and if it gets out by itself then it will be a bird. So all the rest of us have to be very very patient about waiting and stuff. Plus, we have to wait for Spring to come too. That's just how it is.

So Luci found a book in the library about birds too... (well, she found it right in my hand!), because we want to know all about birds and stuff and she believed me about that. And we could only check one book out at a time, but when I had to choose between the two books in my hand...well, I just couldn't pick one and so Luci said she would get the other one. We did paper, rock, scissors, and that is how I got the book about the bird egg colors and she got the other one. There couldn't be a better friend than Luci anywhere from here to Antartica or anywhere. The book I checked out has lots of pictures in it, but she has lots of poems in hers...which when I really think about it, is mine too, sorta. "Let's just share the books Luci," I said, and she said, "OK." Because I also want poems too and I am going to copy one down right here in my journal so I can give Luci back her book in the morning. So here is a poem called: CRADLED NEST (because that is the title of it):

Climbers of trees
makers of swings
marble players
designers of dreams

all chores of childhood
and these must be done
...for miracles are also
at play in the Sun.

The moment...

I held my first found nest,

entwined twigs, paper,
sundry strands of hair,
with reverent hands and rapid heart,
I cradled it ....softly there.

Everyone knows about Birds...

their names,
their colors,
their wings,

yet now
beholdingtheir tiny home;

some mud,
bits of leaf,
and string.

Though Birds had been
Singing all along

from that moment
I began listening to their
SONG.

Seeds Grow,You Know

"EVERYBODY can go except ME. That is soooo NOT fair! I am the ONLY ONE who can't go to the party." That's what I sorta shouted last Thursday in the laundry room after I showed the best invitation in the world to my mom. She was planting tiny seeds in some containers, so it took silence time and then she said super softly (which means her idea was stuck in cement), "Hadley K, I already said that you could go to the party, but you cannot stay overnight...and the reason I said that, is because: You can't."

She was poking little holes, in the dirt holder thing, and planting seeds..and then spraying water over the top. The seeds were so small that I could hardly even see them...even if I wanted to...which right now...I didn't!

I usually help with the plantie and gardeny things. I know those bitty seeds will grow up and up until they have stuff hanging on them like tomatoes and pea pods and beans. It really is a giant miracle. But first, we have to wait for the snow to melt. Then we plant. Then we water, then we wait. And I don't know how they do it...or how the teensy seeds remember, but a carrot seed ALWAYS knows to grow into a carrot. A cucumber seed, ALWAYS remembers to grow into a cucumber. They just know. There will never be a watermelon seed that grows up to be a radish. NEVER EVER! That's why my mom and dad are careful to choose what seeds to plant. It takes a long time though, and so I knew our talking was done. "Mom, I need to go to this party!" I sighed quietly.

She started to give me a hug, which I didn't want right then. Well, I did want her hug...because she is my mom and stuff... (even if she was making a humongous mistake! )

But that was all last week and I should have given her a gianormous hug! And this is why I am writing all this in my journal so I will remember to know next time that my mom really really does get it! I better remember to read this next time my hug is holding back a bit! Remember, Remember, Remember, Hadley K!

It all started when I ran as fast as I could to save the 4-square pad last Thursday for lunch recess. I just plopped right down on the pad and waited for Luci to check out a ball. Just then, Shamee came and asked me if she could have the 4-square pad for her friends and I told her that I promised Luci that I'd save it, but they could take turns with us if they wanted to. I guess they didn't!

Shamee has shiny hair; she is in a high grade and gets to run for a school office, and everybody will vote for her, and she has awesome blue braces on her teeth. Cassandra told Margaret that Shamee had the best braces in the whole school. Shamee just stood there...and I just sat there...(kinda wishing that I wasn't there)... and then she got a big smile and I saw the best braces and yup...they were! They were really really blue. She told me that her birthday was coming and if I would let them have the squares, then she would invite me to her party. You have so got to be kidding me! Of all of my lucky days! ME! Going to Shamee's party! She has her own cell phone and it even takes pictures. Everybody knows that she is popular and now she was going to invite ME to HER party!

"Okay then!" I said,

and then she said: "Great, tell me your name."

and then I did.

She turned around and bounced her 4-square ball. I jumped up quick so it wouldn't turn into a dodge ball. She didn't even say: Thank You, or anything...but she was probably thinking about her birthday. I spent the rest of the week thinking about what present I should take to Shamee's party...how I should have my mom do my hair, and how un-fair it was that I couldn't stay overnight like EVERYBODY else.

"I'm sorry Luci," I whispered when I saw the checked out ball and her sad eyes. I told her the whole deal while we walked back to take turns on the swings. "I'm sorry about 4-square and I'm sorry that you didn't get invited too. But maybe Shamee has an tiny-eensy-teensy house and can only invite a few, very super and important people." It was only one recess ruined, and it was only one party...so Luci shouldn't have been so sad-ee, mad-ee, and stuff. So she had one bad day, she could still have a good life. (I sound like my grandma sometimes!)

Well, I was a (bit) mad too. Its not good to be mad, but mad was on the very top of me because of seeing Luci so sad, and then my mom saying that I couldn't stay overnight. They were ruining my whole social network part on purpose!

I had to remind Shamee about the invitation on Monday. On Tuesday, she brought me the coolest colorfulest card in the universe. It said: Let's PAR-TAY for my B-DAY!!!

Inside it said the stuff about what to plan and things: Friday 6:00 P.M. until Saturday at 10:00 A.M. That just means that everybody else is taking a sleeping bag... EXCEPT ME! Plus, It's a VERY good thing that my dad and mom know where she lives and who her mom is and most of the girls invited or I couldn't even get to go for CAKE AND ICE CREAM!

My parents always want to know where I am and who I am with and what we are going to do. Daddy said that if someone took my bike somewhere, then I would want to know the same things about it. Then he asked me if I AM MORE IMPORTANT than handlebars and pedals... and we just laughed.

On Friday, I tried not to talk about the party so much around Luci. I just told her that I bought a coloring book and some new markers for Shamee. Well...I did tell her that I was going to have my hair pulled up on the sides. But that's all. Oh! Except, I think I told her that I was going to wear my lavendar shirt with the big bow in back. I can't remember, I might have told her that I hope the Birthday cake is chocolate...but that's for sure ALL that I said.

"Be a Lady and be sure to say: Thank You," (my mom always hugs me and says that when I go anywhere.) Be a lady means: Be a Princess...(because I really am one, that's why). Mom said that she or dad would come back to get me at 9:30 PM) PM in this case means: pretty mean...but at least I got to go!) I rang the doorbell. I was in my lavendar shirt and my present was all flowery with a Pink Bow on it! I WAS AT SHAMEE'S BIRTHDAY PARTY...FOR REALS!

And we had so much fun! We played all kinds of games, and we had her cake all baked in ice cream cones! The icing looked like vanilla ice cream with sprinkles...but it wasn't even cold! It wasn't even real ice cream...it was really chocolate cake cones! My mom has got to know about this. I wished Luci could have one...she would think she had died and gone to heaven!

It was the best PAR-TAY e-v-e-r! I really felt like a lady and I remembered to say Thank You. Shamee liked my present... (Who wouldn't? The markers were scented! And everyone of them smelled really good...I tried them all.) One girl named Lesla, giggled at me because I had colors under my nose, but she helped me during 'Pin the Tiara on the Princess' game and so I giggled too.

Now to the part that I want to forget and its also the same part that I want to remember! It was almost 9:00 PM and all of the girls went downstairs to put their sleeping bags in a circle. The Lesla girl let me sit on her sleeping bag with her. At first, everyone was talking about braiding hair, and about riding horses, and about Birthdays and stuff. Luci would have liked the part about riding horses because her uncle just got one. Soon, we all voted to watch TV. I voted to watch 'Little House' re-runs or play games again...but the most votes chose a new program that I hadn't even heard about.

Shamee turned out the lights and the show started. OH MY! It was a very bad show. The actress was not a Lady...she was immodest and disgusting! The actor said two swear words in a row. Even the music was up to no good. It's easy to tell because something inside feels drooped down when stuff is wrong. Two of the girls wanted to change the channel. But, 5 of the girls voted to watch it some more.

"Don't worry, that's just one little part." somebody said. "I watch it all of the time," somebody else agreed. OH MY! I hoped that Shamee's mom would come downstairs. AND Right then...she did come down! I was so glad, now she would change the channel to a good show! ...But SHE DIDN'T Turn that Yucko show off! She just passed around some popcorn and went back upstairs. 'YOU HAVE SO GOT TO BE KIDDING' I thought. Didn't she hear the words? Couldn't she see that Actress? Moms are supposed to pull the plugs!

Something inside of me was kinda scared... sorta like hurry and hide under my bed scared, right then. I looked around at those girls. Rachel and Jaimee had their eyes looking down. Rachel was plugging her ears. The other girls laughed at them and told them to grow up because this wasn't even that bad for now-a-days. WOW! This was a backwards house is all I could think...and some ugly weed seeds were being planted downstairs by that TV show. Do Shamee's friends really think a yuck seed will grow up to be a good seed?

Right then, I said a 'help me' prayer. I didn't want any of this in my 'Angels are Silent Notes taking' book! But, I didn't want anyone to laugh at me... either. The Actress got more immodest. Just then, I remembered Joseph. My Primary teacher told me that he ran away from the immodest queen. I stepped over some girls, and asked Rachel and Jaimee to go upstairs and play a game with me, so we stood up, and we ran up the stairs. And that's when I got it...right at the tippy top of the stairs...a little thought came in my brain all by itself.

Standing for right and sitting for right are not the same sort of seeds!

I am writing this down so I won't forget, because that is a very very IMPORTANT idea that I thought at the top of those stairs.

We played a game...and it was fun...but I was so happy to hear that doorbell at 9:30 PM. Something inside of me smiled really big when I opened the door and saw my dad planted on that porch, juat waiting to take me home.

RULES for the Scary Stuff...

Luci didn't come to school yesterday. She wasn't there when I went to recess, or to lunch, or to walk home with after school. B-O-R-I-N-G! Without your best friend, the days are long and empty and boring and sad. So I was already sad about that.

Then my teacher told me that I would have to choose another partner for spelling check because Luci would be gone for a whole week! WHAT? A WHOLE WEEK! She didn't even tell me about that. She always calls me about things. That's when I got worried. "Luci went to stay with her grandma for a week," Ms. Clay said. A WHOLE WEEK... AT HER GRANDMA'S HOUSE?! She would have told me all about that because nothing is better than going to Grandmas! She would have told me over and over about 23 days in a row about something that exciting and great!

So, inside I knew that something was wrong. VERY VERY WRONG.
Maybe Luci was kid-napped or something. I looked at my teacher real hard. I could tell that she thought she was telling me the whole truth. But sometimes, people don't know about everything and maybe she got a phone call that said what she said they said but maybe what they said wasn't the whole truth, because maybe they were the kidnappers! HOW COULD MY VERY BEST FRIEND BE KID-NAPPED?

Once or maybe 13 times when I was little, I worried about kidnappers, because Reggie told everybody at recess that kidnappers tie you up and then throw you away forever. But my mom said I didn't need to be afraid, I just needed to be wise and aware...and she told me all about the stranger stuff...so I was even way more scared about what if and stuff and I couldn't let it go... until finally mom said I could just remember three things if I ever get kid-napped and then I would be fine. And that worked for me. Plus, when I think about it: FOREVER means Heaven and that means we are okay again...so even IF the worst thing happens...then it really doesn't! I was hoping that I told Luci about the three things. My eyes started to get a little teary right then because maybe Luci was kid-napped and tied up to a tree or something and I can't remember if I told her those 3 things. OH NO! I needed to help her! Oh, Luci...please remember the three kidnapped rules and the part about FOREVER:

#1: We will never ever stop looking for you because we love you. (and I know that is true...because I never will ever forget Luci.
#2: Heavenly Father knows right where you are AT.
#3: Be calm and listen to the Holy Ghost, so you will know what to do and what not to do and when. I should have told her all about that over and over.

I never have to worry again because I know the rules about kidnapping. But I should have told them to Luci 100 times.

Then school was almost out and my teacher told me that I could go get my coat and call my mom when she saw that my tears would not melt back in (no matter how high I raised my eyebrows and looked up at the ceiling or how many times I wiped off my face with my sleeves). THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING TO ME. Luci is my best friend. People can NOT just come and kidnap your best friend.

"Mom, Luci is gon-n-n-n-e," I cried into the office phone. Because when I heard her voice...all of my brave disappeared and I sorta moaned my words out. She told me to calm down a little and to tell her again. "Moooommmmm, Lu-u-u-c-i-i- is go-o-h-h-hon-n-n-n-ne." The office lady put her arm around me and gave me the whole kleenex box. Mom knew that I was having a streak of a panic too, because she talked very quietly and calmly: "Honey, I will be right there. Let me talk to the secretary for a minute and you just stay right there. I am coming." So I gave the phone to the secretary and I sat in a chair and kept pulling the tissues out one by one because my tears just kept racing down my face and I just kept thinking about my best kid-napped friend.

When my mom came, she hugged me and told me that everything would be all right. In the car on the way home she asked: "Honey, what's the matter? Why are you so sad?" And that's when I told her that Luci was kid-napped and that I had to save her...plus, we needed to make flyers and put them on every tree in the whole town. She pulled the car over right then and held me, "Hadley K, who told you that? Luci wasn't kid-napped! She is just fine, honey. She is probably baking cookies with her grandma right now."

"Mom, she would have told me if she was going to her grandmas." And then I thought about my mom's question and about my answer: NO ONE told me that Luci was kid-napped...that's WHO. NOBODY! So she wasn't! She wasn't kidnapped. Oh brother. I used up all the kleenex in the whole entire school principle's office for nothing because Luci was probably baking cookies right now. I can't believe that she didn't even tell me! She better save me one of those cookies in a little baggie thingy... that's all. Actually two of them. But when I looked at my mom...I could tell...that wasn't ALL.

"Honey, you know that Luci's mom has not been feeling well for a while. Well, the doctors just told her that she has cancer and they are trying to help her. "What?" I looked at my mom. "Cancer?" That word gave me the heebie jeebs...because it is a very very bad word and I don't want Luci's mom to have that word. Mom got all quiet again and said, "The doctors are going to do surgery, so Luci will be staying with her grandmother for a week. They just found out, or I think Luci would have called you." I felt stuck to the words and could not move. "What is the surgery thingy about mom?" I asked. She told me that the doctors would do all they could to help Luci's mom because she was very sick.

And then mom had a great idea. "Hadley, maybe you could make a get well card for Luci's mom? I think that would cheer her up.

I got out the paper and markers and took my time so it would be a good card and cheer her up a real lot. Then I had another idea to make a card for Luci too. And I am glad that I made those cards...well...because for the first thing... it will make them feel better and for the next thing, it made me feel better. I don't like it when I can't do anything to help people when they have surgery. OHHH, she will have to have real shots and real stitches too. But, mom says that you can always help people, even if you don't have any markers for a card or even if you're not the doctor. You can always say a prayer for them. And I said extra prayers for Luci's mom because Luci really really needs her mom.

When the phone rang, I thought it was Luci...and it was! She sounded a little sad and she told me that she was at her grandma's house. I didn't tell her that I already knew that, because sometimes it is nicer to let people say it again if they want. She told me that she would be there for the whole week. Hmmm. I already knew that part too and I almost told her, but she was still talking and so I just let it go. She said that her mom was going to have surgery. OH boy! I almost said something right then...because I already knew all of that...but maybe she needed to say it to me...and so I listened to her like my mom had listened to me. I think listening sometimes makes people feel better some way. Luci said, "Would you take my library book back for me?" And I said. "Yes, I will Luci. I would be honored to take it back for you" plus, it was already at my house because it was the book about birds and she had really checked it out for me anyway! And then she told me that her mom has cancer. And right then, I was glad that I already knew about that...because I told her that I made a card for her mom and said some prayers about her mom and I could tell that she was cheered up a little about that. Then I asked if she was making cookies or anything and she said "No, because we were all fasting for my mom." And right then, she had to go because her grandma wanted all of the kids to come for a blessing and have dinner. "Good-bye Hadley." "Good-bye Luci.

I sorta just sat there. You have to have your mom. You have to. This whole thing was bigger than me and Luci put together. I wanted to stop everything and get it all figured out. I couldn't think about my homework. I almost forgot to feed Scruffy. At dinner, I pushed the food around on my plate and then put the peas in straight lines. When people are too sad, then food doesn't taste like anything and you just have to chew it and swallow it anyway. I saw the paperboy riding his bike on his way to soccer practice. How can people just chew gum and ride bikes and go play soccer right now when Luci's mom has to have surgery? Mom said that we should mail the cards to Luci's grandma's house first thing tomorrow. I hope my cards will make them happy again. I put alot of pink on Luci's because she extra love, love, loves pink!

I couldn't even sleep last night because I kept thinking about Luci's mom. I have to sort out all of my ideas into piles and rows in my mind. And right when the grandfather clock donged for eleven times (opps! that is very late!) I decided to say one more prayer about the cancer thing. I knelt on top of my bed...because...well... I am not afraid like when I was little or anything...but I have a thing about not having my feet on the floor in the dark. Because right by my bed is (right by) UNDER my bed. And just then I remembered about Daniel and how he prayed even if he was scared of going down by those hungry lions and when he decided that Heavenly Father was in charge, then Daniel wasn't afraid at all and he just marched right down into that den and petted all of those lions on the head...and then I decided that I needed to have great faith...so I turned my bed lamp on and knelt down on the floor. I can usually tell when my prayers just hit the ceiling and come back down. But I needed this one to keep going. I explained everything to Heavenly Father about Luci's mom. I know that He already knows everything about her, but I wanted to tell Him how Luci needs her mom real real bad. And when I said AMEN...then I jumped real quick back up on my bed and pulled the covers up fast. I didn't really want the light off, but I waited for a minute or 12 and then I turned it off real quick and closed my eyes. I think that is right at the moment when I got an instantly idea in my head. All of a sudden I knew the rules about Cancer and about being really really really sick and about Forever and about LIFE and about all the Surgery and Scary Stuff. They were the same rules about Kidnapping Things! I have to tell Luci about them when I see her and then she will not have to worry anymore.

I turned the lamp back on and got a paper and pencil quick before I forgot.

RULES ABOUT SURGERY AND BEING REALLY SICK AND ABOUT LIFE AND ALL THE SCARY STUFF:

#1: WE WILL NEVER EVER stop LOVING YOU

#2: HEAVENLY FATHER KNOWS RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE AT (He Loves us and He Knows where people should be when... and He knows why.)

#3: BE CALM AND LISTEN TO THE HOLY GHOST, SO YOU WILL KNOW WHAT TO DO AND WHAT NOT TO DO AND WHEN to do or not to do it.

Then I decided to add my very own rule,

RULE #4: FOREVER MEANS FOREVER. WE CAME HERE TO GET THERE AND THERE IS FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER AND EVER...So nothing can really be too sad if I think about it! I started to write down all the rules on Luci's card because she is my very best friend.

...and all of a sudden my eyes started to go to sleep without me and so I pulled the covers up again and fell asleep without even a teensy beansy weensy worry at all.

Chocolate Milk Tuesdays

I don’t think Margaret should go to the front of the line just because she was born into an ‘A’ family. I didn’t ask to be born into an ‘S’ family. Margaret Allen is marching right up to the tippy top front of the lunch line with a big letter A right where it matters.

I’m Hadley K Merit Shay, with a big S where it counts and a big H where it doesn’t.

From about the Q’s on back, we may as well have brought our sticky peanut butter and honey lunches from home.

We can all smell the cookies.
We get what the word ‘singed’ means.
We know who burnt the cookies.

I think the lunch ladies wear those hair nets tight on purpose so we won’t recognize them later in town and point them out to our parents. I don’t know if they can’t smell burnty things, or if they just smile big to pretend it all away and hope we won’t notice.

I figure those cookies will be served just about when the Q’s group gets to the tray window….which really means the R group since there are no Q names in Ms. Clay’s class. Which really means that Monte Rasmussen, Neil Reed, Martha J. Rolland, and I, will get way dark brown, peanut butter cookies that should have come out sooner, and they shall no longer be ‘sumptuous’ or some word like that, and that Skyler Tayman, and Misha R. Wheatley will probably not even get cookies at all. I don’t really blame those ladies for sneaking the good cookies before us kids come to the lunchroom. They probably deserve it with all the loud trays banging around all day. I just blame having to be near the end of the line everyday because my last name begins with ‘S’ and is: Shay. That’s all.

Same with recess. Margaret Allen and Shelly Bensen always get the best swings because Margaret runs out quick from the front of the line and grabs two swings and winds the chains and won’t let go for Shane Atkins or nobody no matter what they have to trade.

Same with the spelling Bee. I forgot how to spell all of those words by the time they got to the Shay part of the class. If you really want pretty much the truth, I probably practiced my spelling list as hard as Cody Burch who, as we speak, has a spelling trophy on his dresser at home. And they were hard words. VERY HARD. And I was prepared and ready. But you can’t be ready forever you know.

Oh no. OH NO! Don’t tell me. There is no more chocolate milk! You-have-got-to-be-kidding! This is Tuesday and I always have chocolate milk on Tuesdays. This is my one day each week to have a real school lunch and now it is all ruined! It is all burnt and missing and ruined. My mother will be glad about this. She really thinks milk should be white that’s all. So it took a lot of time to help her understand about my chocolate need on Tuesdays. And now this! I used up all of my best begging energy for nothing. I should have asked for a horse instead.
“Come on, Luci Megan”, I grumped to my best friend as we trudged from the ‘pick up your tray here’ window. We looked down at our sloshy peaches, stringy beans, our noodle whatever you call it, white regular everyday milk, and our burnty cookies, and then slowly found a double place to sit at our table. We accidentally looked over at the small brown carton on Margaret’s tray and we both sorta felt like crying.

“Stay calm.” I whispered to Luci. “During this tragedy, we must stay calm, because we are not in kindergarten anymore you know.”

Luci muttered a half-hope: “Maybe our moms will let us take lunch tomorrow again since it didn’t work out so good today?”

“It’s not in the budget Luci.” And I sighed a little, like my mother. With Luci and me, I always have to be the strong one. My mind was running races for a good idea to make us feel better about our lives. “We have to think of something to fill its place; something to cheer us up until next Tuesday Luci. It doesn’t help to act like we just got poisoned when things don’t go our way. We can’t just sit here and look at the deep deep hole of what didn’t go…we need to fill it up with something else instead.” My Grandma always says stuff like that. But chocolate is a big hole to fill and burnt cookies are a yucky thing to smell. So, we better think of something really really fantastico.

Right in the middle of a mouthful, I got a great idea! “Luci, we have to separate out.” Luci looked at me like a question mark without words. “I think I have an idea and you need to trust me because we have to separate out for about two days. But I will write you notes and stuff and tell you what to do and you are still my best friend.” Luci just sat there a bunch bewildered as I picked up my tray and moved to the other end of the table.

Maybe I should have given her more information so she would finish her peaches at least. So I hurried back to her end of the table and whispered quick: “Luci, we are going to get our names to the first of the lines for a change. You didn’t choose to come to an “R” family”, and then I thought about it a second. Maybe she did. But even so, I don’t know if we knew about the alphabet and lunch lines and stuff until we came to earth and so my plan was still a good one.

"Anyway, Luci, we have to stand up for truth. And the truth is: that sometimes, we people at the back of the alphabet should be at the front of the lines. If our teacher thinks two of us thought it up by ourselves, then it is more than if we say it together in one group. Get it?” I don’t know if she did, but after I got back to my tray, I peeked out of the corner of my eye and saw her eat one more bite of beans.

I wrote nine good notes to Luci over the next two very very long (and I do mean long)days:

Note 1: “Don’t look at me too much Luci, or everybody will know we are making a plan.”Note 2: “Dear Luci, I miss you, but we HAVE to finish this quest for the sake of all the last of the alphabet people all over this school. Stay true, whatever you do!"
Note 3: “Ok Luci, you will finally be happy for TODAY IS THE DAY! Just go up to Ms. Clay and ask if the back of the line can switch with the front.”
Note 4: “Oh, I forgot to tell you to do it between spelling and reading, so it won’t be so OBVIOUS…if you know what I mean.” That one had 4 smiley faces at the bottom. I could tell that Luci was starting to get nerves going.

Note 5: “What do you mean you don’t know what to say?”
Note 6: “Just act normal Luci. Don’t pass out now. Just act like real people and go to her desk and say, ‘Hi Ms. Clay, I was wondering if we could sometimes put the Z people where the A people are or something.’ Luci, you will know what to say, I don’t have any room to write any more words on this piece of pa…”
Note 7: “Don’t worry so much Luci, PALEEEESE! Just take a breath. CALM DOWN!, It doesn’t matter your words as long as you say them absolutely perfectly right, ok?”
Note 8: Luci, just get it over with. Maybe my mom will let me buy you a bunny or something good for your birthday! Just do it!”
Note 9: You did it! You are so brave and you are my very very very best friend…ok…ok, now it is my turn…ummm…what do you think I should say?”

I stood on my tippy toes and peeked in the window. Luci Megan didn’t like our plan so much anymore, but she was a good sport because her birthday is coming up and so she is sorta thinking about presents and about being happy to help. “Hold still Luci!” There was Ms. Clay at her desk. She was correcting spelling and she was alone. I held on to the bricks and tried to steady myself back down. Oh No. That is really what I call Mud. “You know Luci, it wasn’t very easy for me to balance on your back either ya know.” I had to say that because when she got up she would see what I was seeing right then…and it was mucho mud on her pant knees.

Oops. “Stay here Luci!”

I took a huge deep breath and hurried into the school and into our room before the bell would bring everybody back from recess. “Hi Ms. Clay.” It isn’t polite to interrupt even if my idea was more important. And then I just stood there, wishing I wasn’t there, while she finished the spelling page she was on. Finally after about three years, she looked up, over the top of her glasses at me.

I took a giantic breath: “Well, I was thinking about a new creative innovation of a huge idea for our school.”

“That’s nice of you to think about our school,” she smiled. Tell me about your idea.”

And so I told her all about how Skunks and Tyrontasorousas and other back of the line animals might be nicer if they weren’t always last and stuff. Scientifically, I wonder if we should put the Alphabet backwards just to see if all the letters should feel important. She was squinting a bit. I think she was wanting to really understand where I was coming from with this and I was all of a sudden not so sure and so it was a huge relief when that bell rang right then.

Next thing you know…Ms. Clay is announcing to everyone that we will change things up a bit on Monday. Well, believe me, after waiting all weekend for Monday and changing things up a bit…we CERTAINLY did. Luci and I and all of the R-Z people got to give our science reports first. Yikes! I thought I had two more days…and my ants had not even found the sugar yet! Then, we got to be first to lunch. WONDERFUL, except the hurry, hurry, hurry, people are waiting behind you all day, part. After art, we got to be the first to clean the sinks. WOOEY! I couldn’t remember all of my spelling words with everyone looking at me at the front of the line. Drats! We got out first to recess, but that meant we had to ‘check out the ball and be responsible to bring it back and check off our names or our names were on the list’! When I was in my old spot, I didn’t even know a list exists.

It was an exhausting Monday. Luci and I walked home from school, tired as cats in the sun. The front of the line isn’t really what we wanted is it Luci?” I complained, “It is a guinea pig place to be, don’t you think Luci?”

She just looked at me and threw her hands up in the air, “You are such an all or nothing Hadley K! First, you are at the back and now you are at the front. Now what?” I had to think a really really long time. But right in the middle of remembering about all the mud on her pants, I burst into a giant smile: “Luci! I have a plan.”
“Oh no, Oh no,”she hollered and started to run.

“Luci,” I shouted, “we really need to be in the K-R group!” She was already running up her walk and before I could tell her that I would write her really good notes, she ran into her house and shut the door quick.
I couldn’t even hardly believe myself! The very next day, Luci and I, and all the alphabet ends are smack dab in the middle of the lunch line as if Ms. Clay had read my mind. “This is my kind of people Luci, I was meant to be in the K-R group. There is no fun in being at the first or last of the Alphabet but this is heaven.” (Well, it’s probably like Telestial or something, cuz’ I was thinking that Celestial would mean we were home and school was out for the summer or something like that.)

“Anyway, here we are Luci, right in the middle and so we get our chocolate milk and we are a bit squished but it is worth it, isn’t it Luci. And we don’t have to check out balls for recess, or wait a long time for our turn, or be first to spell or last to leave and so this is the best, huh Luci!”

And then we were about up to the tray window, and life was like blissfull and everything, until I spied the crate of chocolate milk. I added quick in my mind. Oh No! Don’t tell me. Oh NO! What is up with this? Only this one Tuesday all week and only four brown cartons left. What is up with this? Only 4 CARTONS of Chocolate Milk! I speed counted: Monte Rasmussen, Neil Reed, Martha J. Rolland, and me. I had to think quick.

“You know what Luci, I don’t think the middle of the alphabet is all that people think it is. It is just squish, squish, squish. I liked it better when we were who we are, sorta.”

Yikes! I thought. I was only two people away from the last chocolate milk in the whole wide school. I thought about how that delicious creamy chocolate of wonderful would glide past my happy tongue all the way down to my toes. OH NO! For a second, I wanted to grab that chocolate milk and run. I’d hide behind the playground tree and drink it all by myself.
But most of all, I didn’t want a chocolate page to ruin my whole 'Angels with silent notes taking' book. After all, I WAS wearing my CTR ring on purpose.
“Luci, I have a splendiferous plan! We really really need to separate out. You stay here." Luci looked at me like a question mark without words. "Luci, I have a plan, you have to trust me; I’m going to the back of the line where we used to be. I think way back there is the best place in the whole alphabet for me. And Luci, you really are my very very best friend.”

Science Fair SECRET!

"Don't tell anybody. Okay Luci?"

She promised me that she wouldn't tell a soul..."with scout's honor" she said. (Only she isn't a scout).

I didn't want anyone to know what my science project was going to be because just in case they copy my idea at the last last minute. It is such a great idea! Luci said so too.

Ms. Clay said that we could start setting up on Tuesday. So I didn't want anyone to know until then... for sure!

My journal is a safe place to write in...and so I will keep track of it all right here. I am making Crystals for my project. REAL CRYSTALS! And I got a book all about it. All you have to have is sugar and water...well, I really mean salt and water and lots of other stuff. We tried the sugar thing first, but it didn't work so well (the sugar stuff burnt and whewy...that was bad...and so forget the sugar) and then we did the salt thing. You take 1 cup of water and 2 cups of salt and cook it. I can't remember exactly how we did it now. Anyway, take lots of cups and jars and ice cube trays or bowls or whatever and take lots of pencils or pens or straws or whatever to put across the cups and jars and ice cube trays and bowls or whatever and they will hold the string that goes down with a nail or paper clip on the end in the water and salt. Then just wait for a few days...and then keep waiting. And we are still waiting!
Kaylee is using clorox water and food coloring to show how flowers can change their colors. It's cool because you can see that they really drink the water up into their stems and stuff. I might put coloring in my cups. Yeah, that would be awesome. And it would NOT be copying because hers is about flowers and mine is about Crystals. Plus, it's a great idea and ideas are just floating in the air sometimes and don't really belong to anybody.

Autumn is taking sodas like Mountain Dew and coke and 7-up to show which one bubbles most. But when she put a nail in a cup of Mountain Dew and coke then that soda eats the nail right up in a few days! No wonder mom doesn't buy soda very much. That stuff would eat my stomach away! GROSS! Plus, Misha is using dish soap and 7-up and water to see what cleans a penny the best. That is sorta like a science experiment...but sorta like a clean the house chore I think. Maybe her mom wants to know how to clean things better, I don't know. But whatever helps them I guess; it just doesn't seem so much like science but more like Saturday chores.

Garrett is doing "Protect the Geysers" and it is awesome! He has two big buckets and they erupt... so on Tuesday morning, we all went outside to watch. Some of the kids got tired of standing by those buckets and GAVE UP and went inside and missed it...but not me. I stood right there for the whole thing. One of the buckets was clogged and so it never did anything but fizz a bit. Ms. Clay finally told us to come in. I think Garrett used lots of baking soda for that. Maybe he will give me his secret recipe so I can show mom and dad. Even my brother would like that.

Hunter is having a rotten egg experiment. He has some clothespins to plug your nose with. NOT ME! I WON'T even go NEAR his desk. What kind of an experiment is that?
Regge is doing a beeper thingy. And he keeps making it beep real loud. "Turn that off!" Logan shouted at him and some of the girls plugged their ears and lots of kids just rolled their eyes. IT was LOUD! But Regge said he had to try it out to make sure it works. Well, believe me...it DID!

Cody didn't have a clue about what to do on Tuesday...so Ms. Clay told him to think really hard about it because he only had three days until the science fair on Friday. He didn't have a clue about what to do on Wednesday and so Ms. Clay told him to think really really hard about it because he only had two days until the science fair on Friday. He didn't have a clue about what to do on Thursday and so Ms. Clay told him to think really really really hard about ti because he only had one day until the science fair on Friday. Cody didn't have a clue about what to do on Friday and so Ms. Clay took him out into the hall and they had a long talk. When they came back in, I thought Cody would be crying, but I saw Ms. Clay wipe her eyes and so I know there was a REAL reason that Cody was not prepared. I know that for positive sure because Ms. Clay gave him a magnifying glass and some newspapers and some water to see how things get amplified sort of.

Madison made clouds with hot water at the bottom of a jar and a container of ice on top...only she was to supposed to put it in the freezer on Thursday and she forgot. Margaret made mothballs dance, Kate had a pea experiment, and Jaden made a volcano! Luci did an ant colony...just like the one I did last year. I even helped her find the queen. When she took the black paper off her jar we could see all of the tunnels and now I wish I had done that again...because I put all my containers and strings and things on my desk and my poster all about Crystals and I had about three little ones started but I was still WAITING.

On Friday we marched into the gym in rows. Each row got twenty minutes to set up their science project and then they had to go back to the room and find something quietly to do. That means read! I put up my poster. It said: COLORFUL CRYSTAL CREATIONS. That is pretty clever. And I put my best 9 containers on the table in front of the poster. They looked like color all right...but I needed to borrow the magnifying glass from Cody if anyone wanted to see the crystals hanging in the bottom of three of the cups. I am still WAITING!

I felt sad when I looked around at everybody else's tables. I felt really sad when I heard Regge's beeping over and over. Ouch...there goes my ear drums. There should be a school rule about NO BEEPERS at science fairs. I felt really really sad and almost got some tears when I saw Cassandra's 'Progressing Plants in Process' project and her beautiful growing garden and her hydro whatever. Her hair was perfect and she had two little pea pod barretts to match her ruffly garden apron. Kids walked by my part of our table and looked way down in my cups and then looked at me and didn't say anything mostly...and then they oohed and awed when they stood around Jaden's volcanos and Cassandra's plants.

Luci and me thought maybe Cassandra's parents did her project by themselves and so it didn't really count so much. Or maybe her uncle is a 'horticulture' guy (that is a really great word that means a garden man. I like big words, but I wasn't liking her perfect project right then). Or maybe she has an aunt who does fancy lettering for her perfect poster and is like pro-fession-al! Or maybe...she probably has a grandma who sews her cute clothes and bought her those pea pod barretts? We watched Luci's ants for a while...and wondered how life and a science fair could possibly be fair.

And then I heard a girl say, "Who is Hadley K?" and it was a girl from a high grade and she was looking at my crystals! She looked at them for a long time and she said that mine was the best project of all. And she asked me lots of questions because she wants to try it. They are 'so pretty' she said. And after she left...I looked at my poster and yup...it was pro-fession-al! That girl changed my whole science fair. I thought alot about that. And then I got a great idea!

My crystals did not work...but I could try an experiment that would. When I think about it...that girl changed me from a frown to a smile in a minute. How did she do that? I thought and thought about that. She wasn't extra extra pretty. She didn't have fancy clothes or matching barrettes and shoes. She didn't think she already knew everything. She was just kind. ..plus, she was interested. That's all. And 'kind' feels good. I decided to do an experiment. I looked around the gym and saw other kids that sat by their projects all alone too. I thought I was the only one. "Luci, we need to try a people experiment." I whispered to her all about my great idea!

Well, Luci started over by Kaylee's table and I started by Olivia's table and then we would meet in the middle. The experiment: Be interested and Be kind to everyone who sat alone by their project. Ask a question, say something nice, and see if they smiled. Then meet back by the ant farm in twelve minutes. "Ready Luci?" She nodded her head and then she got a little bit shy because on her side was Carter and she thinks Carter is really cute and so FINE...of course, she couldn't talk to Carter... and so we traded places.

I hope I always remember this science fair...and I will (because that's what journals are for) and I want all my kids to know about our GREAT PEOPLE EXPERIMENT when they get to earth! ok, so...Luci and I went all around the gym. I told Hannah that she had pretty rocks and a nice chart. Makayla had nice colors on her poster. Kadence organized her pictures in a circle and I like circles. Jacob had his solar system in a neat row and I like neat rows. Sienna chose good pictures for her animal food chain.

And Regge...oh brother...I would have to get Regge's part of a table. I wanted to PLUG MY EARS and PASS HIM BY. BEEPERS should NOT be allowed at Ephraim Elementary. But there he was, all alone, right NEXT to Cassandra's crowd of giggles. (Are people there because of her plants or because of her pea pods and popular?) "Regge," I tried to think of something good about his project. I wanted to be interested. I had to be kind. "Well...hmmmm...I think you...well...good job Regge!" I was still trying to think of something that was sincere. I can't throw lies into my experiment or it isn't REAL. "Do you want me to Beep it for you Hadley?" "Oh NO!" I said quickly...(maybe too quickly)..."Actually I already heard it" (On Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and about thirty two times already on Friday I thought.) "No, I just wanted to tell you that you spelled everything just right on your poster." Oh brother, that was lame. "And... your beeper thing...is LOUD...and it is probably the LOUDEST experiment in the whole school." Regge got a big smile on his face. "You got that right!" he said. And I knew by his smile that I did. I did get that right.

On the way home from school, Luci and I talked about the volcanos and ants and dancing mothballs and water magnifiers and cleaning pennies and yucky soda and peas and garden plants and barrettes and clouds and protecting geysers and lots and lots of stuff...but mostly we talked about the best secret experiment of the whole science fair. The people experiment. EVERY time we were nice to someone, they felt better (and we know they did) because they smiled. And that was the best thing ever to prove. And when I think about it, the results of that experiment happened lots faster than growing crystals...still W-A-I-T-I-N-G!